Tuesday, August 28, 2012

If you meet Sasquatch on the road

So, picture this: you're driving down a country road in Montana at night when suddenly a large bipedal hairy thing appears in the road! You slam on the brakes but your car strikes the creature, sending it flying. You've just made (and possibly killed) the greatest cryptozoological find of the 21st century!

Or maybe it's just a drunk guy in a furry camo suit trying to get on "Finding Bigfoot" or something. You, kind reader, just got Squatched!

swiped from cryptomundo.com because I'm too lazy to photoshop it myself, but it should really be Paul

This is certainly not the first Bigfoot hoax someone tried to perpetrate. Notable prior hoaxes include the Patterson film (the granddaddy of all Sasquatch sightings), the 2008 "I've got a Bigfoot in a freezer" hoax, and every single other Bigfoot sighting, ever.

This may be the first cryptozoohoax, and possibly the first Forteana-based hoax  that led to a death however (excluding Oak Island, I'm talking about the people actually pulling off the hoax here). I can't think of any others and some very shoddy and rudimentary research doesn't turn any up.

There are three tragic lessons to be drawn from this unfortunate incident. 1) If you think standing by the side of the road at night wearing a dark outfit designed to keep you from being seen sounds like a great idea, you may want to check yourself before you wreck yourself. 2) Sales of ghillie suits are about to go through the roof. 3) Bigfoots aren't real.

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